


Metanoia

by Underbluesky



Category: GOT7
Genre: GOT7 - Freeform, M/M, Multi, Past 2jae, jjp, little angst, markson
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-05
Updated: 2017-04-06
Packaged: 2018-10-15 04:43:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10550260
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Underbluesky/pseuds/Underbluesky
Summary: Metanoia = the Journey of changing one's heart, self or way of life.Jackson and Mark are best friend. Always be. They never know how their feeling’s for each other.Because of that, they keep their feeling and turn out hurt each other deeply.Sometime, i hope i just never met you before.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I decide to let you know who will the main character(s) in this story aside Markson. I am sorry I can’t help because I am kinda jjp trash. Hehe. But can help 2jae too. Somehow, I am sure yugbam is real too. Lol.
> 
> And this is my first time post a story here ;3

Feeling used but I am  
Still missing you  
And I can’t  
See the end of this  
Just wanna feel your kiss  
Against my lips  
And now all this time  
Is passing by  
But I still can’t seem to tell you why  
It hurts me every time I see you  
Realize how much I need you

  
“you know I am your best friend”  
“Yeah, I know it Jacks. Thanks”  
“And I am forever your best friend”  
_I need to forget those lips and buried all my hopes. Because we’re best friend for fucking ever and I can’t tell you that it hurts._

I hate you I love you  
I hate that I love you  
Don’t want to but I can’t put  
Nobody else above you  
I hate you I love you  
I hate that I love you  
You want her you need her  
And I’ll never be her

“Just go. He need you”  
“But, I love you”  
“love you too, but you need him”  
“you’re my everything. This is not the end of us”  
“you want me, but you need him”  
“I am fine. I am still your best man later. It’s just little incident. There’s no worried about”  
_Except the pain on my chest. You want her and you got her, I’ll never be her_  
“I am happy for you, Always”

I miss you when I can’t sleep  
Or right after coffee  
Or right when I can’t eat  
I miss you in my front seat  
Still got sand in my sweaters  
From nights we don’t remember  
Do you miss me like I miss you ?  
Fucked around and got attached to you

“what are you doing to my head?”  
And every memories about you… about us… why now? What happen with me?

Friends can break your heart too,  
And I'm always tired but never of you  
If I pulled a you on you, you wouldn't like that shit  
I put this reel out, but you wouldn't bite that shit  
I type a text but then I never mind that shit  
I got these feelings but you never mind that shit  
Oh oh, keep it on the low  
You're still in love with me but your friends don't know  
If you wanted me you would just say so  
And if I were you, I would never let me go

“Hey, I am sorry. It was a mistake. We still good right?”  
“uhm, yeah. It’s fine”  
“ should we talk about that night? I think we need to clear some – “  
“Hey, it’s fine, really. We both drunk and you said it was a mistake”  
“ did you ever want me? Like you said that time?”  
“wha- you remember?”

I don't mean no harm  
I just miss you on my arm  
Wedding bells were just alarms  
Caution tape around my heart  
You ever wonder what we could have been?  
You said you wouldn't and you fucking did  
Lie to me, lie with me, get your fucking fix  
Now all my drinks and all my feelings are all fucking mixed  
Always missing people that I shouldn't be missing  
Sometimes you gotta burn some bridges just to create some distance  
I know that I control my thoughts and I should stop reminiscing  
But I learned from my dad that it's good to have feelings

“Shit. What are you doing Mark? Why are you being like this?”  
“Did you ever imagine what we could do if we together?”  
“Stop, just stop”

When love and trust are gone  
I guess this is moving on  
Everyone I do right does me wrong  
So every lonely night I sing this song

“It’s already too late, Mark ! forget and move on !”  
“I can’t Jacks. I can’t forget all of us. When.. when you know.. I just miss you…”  
_Do you think I am not too?_

I hate you, I love you,  
I hate that I love you  
Don't want to but I can't put nobody else above you  
I hate you, I love you,  
I hate that I want you  
You want her, you need her  
And I'll never be her

All alone I watch you watch her  
Like she's the only girl you've ever seen  
You don't care you never did  
You don't give a damn about me  
Yeah all alone I watch you watch her  
She is the only thing you ever see  
How is it you never notice  
That you are slowly killing me  
I hate you, I love you,  
I hate that I love you  
Don't want to but I can't put nobody else above you  
I hate you, I love you  
I hate that I want you  
You want her, you need her  
And I'll never be her  
00  
  



	2. Things Happen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Hey Jacks, How’s your sleep?”  
> “… if you said that every day, I will think that you love me Mark”  
> “But I do love you”  
> “… right”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my story here and i hope you guys tell me what are you thinking about this.  
> :D

“Hey Jacks, How’s your sleep?”

“… if you said that every day, I will think that you love me Mark”

“But I do love you”

“… right”

“so, where is your homework?”

“I knew it”

Their first met was when they were at baby care. Such a total opposite characters, actually. Their friendship kind of surprised everyone. When Jackson Wang known as social butterfly and Mark Tuan known as coolest guy on their school. But one thing for sure, where is Jackson there is always be Mark. Jackson is typical smart boy and really good in every sport. Mark didn’t do much for his academic career but when it comes about sport, he is match rival for Jackson. One thing about Mark, he is total player. Jackson never bothered about Mark’s reputation. Sure, he dated some of his friends but he is not a playboy. In some many ways, they are different but same in the same times.

“hey”

“hm. Yeah?”

“where are you?”

“Youngji’s. why?”

“…ehm. Oh. Sleep over?”

“maybe. What happen?”

“I’m just about to come to your house. I can’t sleep. But since-“

“I am coming home”

“No! No need. I will walk around. You don’t need to-“

“At this hour? I know you already at my room, Mark. So wait there. I am on my way”

“… Okay”

 

 

“so, tell me. What happened?” Jackson asked right after he open his room. Mark already laid on his bed and look up the ceiling aimlessly. He got up when hear Jackson voice then shrugged off.

“I am kinda on date with someone from our class, then suddenly my mom called me to come home and… they announce to get divorce” said Mark blankly.

“your parents?” ask Jackson surprised.

“who else, you fool? The best part is, they ask me _nicely_ to choose which one I want to stay with.” Said Mark with desperate sigh. Jackson just pat his best friend’s back carefully.

“so, who?”

“here” answer Mark immediately.

“What?” said Jackson surprised. _What was Mark thinking? Is he just insane or what?_

“I mean, I didn’t answer and run away. To here. So, can I spend the night here?” said Mark.

“…yeah” said Jackson finally. Mark smiled and punch Jackson’s shoulder gently.

“hey, Jacks”

“hm?”

“sorry, because of me, you can’t spend the night with Youngji.” Said Mark slowly. Jackson just sighed and shrugged off. He then turn off the light and mumbled

“she will understand tho. Because it was _Mark’s emergency call_ like she always said”

 

 

 

 

                Mark wake up on Jackson’s bed. There is something that always made Mark come asleep every time he lay on Jackson’s bed. He heard water running in bathroom and assume that Jackson in it. So he just sat up and wondering what decision will he make for the question of his parent. Let’s thinking about that, his parents always fighting, he knew. But when they decide to divorce, it made Mark really hurt. He just can’t accept it easily because he always thinking that they still love each other, deep in their heart.

                “Mark?” Jackson called Mark from his deep thought. Mark look up and meet worried eyes Jackson. Jackson still just using towel on his lower body, his hair damp and smell fresh make Mark stunned for a moment.

                “you okay?” Jackson asked ad got a nod as reply from Mark. With that, Mark rose and walk to bathroom.

                They go to school as usual, laughing and joking. Mostly Jackson tell the story and Mark just listen and laugh until Mark mention Youngji. Jackson suddenly feel confused when Youngji came out from Mark’s mouth.

                “so, last night I just get a date with Nayeon. Youngji’s friend. I feel guilty left her suddenly. Is Youngji tell anything last night?” asked Mark. Jackson kept silent for a minute. Well, Youngji and Jackson not only stay to study. They do _other stuff_ too. Before Mark’s called after all.

                “she didn’t mention anything actually. But I will ask her after we in school” answer Jackson finally. Mark just humming. Then, he watch Jackson weirdly.

                “what?” asked Jackson.

                “you get closer with Youngji lately. You guys… together?” asked Mark curious. They stare each other. Mark study Jackson’s expression.

                “No. we aren’t” said Jackson flatly. With that, they arrived at their school.

 

                They walk apart. Jackson try to find Youngji and Mark just walk to their class. But even when bell didn’t ring yet, Mark already bored and decide that to skip his class and walk to rooftop. He spent his first period just laid on the floor and stare cloudy sky. He should decide it soon or later. He truly love his parents, of course even when they rarely at home. His brother looks didn’t care since he already work and got his own apartment. If he try to stay at his brother, that means he should go to school earlier. The distance is too much. He didn’t like it.

                Mark sighed again. When he went to get his cigarette, he heard someone banged the door open. He saw Jaebum sighed with angry expression on his face. Seems like Jaebum aware there is Mark with him and decide to walk over to Mark and lay beside him with loud sigh.  

                “What happen?” asked Mark.

                “I am late. Damn.” Said Jaebum without open his eyes. Mark look like waiting next story.

                “ jinyoung and I fought last night. So we _made up_ and he just didn’t wake me up this morning and left to school without me” said Jaebum desperate. Mark is pervert, he imagine something dirty when Jaebum mention made up part.

                “I know what you thinking Mark. You’re right. We did it” said Jaebum expressionless.

                “Oh my god Jaebum, why you need to confirm that? Ew, don’t need to hear that.” Said Mark with horrified expression made Jaebum rolling on the floor, laughing.

                “so, how is Youngjae?” asked Jaebum suddenly after his laugh  died down.

                “he is just fine without you. Why you suddenly ask about him?” asked Mark with piercing eyes. He didn’t mind their relationship, but he just didn’t want something bad happen in the future.

                “nothing. Just asking tho” said Jaebum shrugged. But, what make Mark believe that?

                “ah, actually… the reason why me and Jinyoung fought last night, is Youngjae” whispered Jaebum. Suddenly Mark know something and his eyes gone wide.

                “He found out?” asked Mark.

                With tiny voice Jaebum answered a yes.

 

 

                “so what happen with Mark this time?” first thing Youngji asked when she met Jackson.

                “hey, what’s with that tone?” asked Jackson frowned. He was sure that Youngji never mind last night when he go home last night. Why suddenly she really look so pissed off?

                “nothing, I was just asking” said Youngji shrugged, suddenly look distant. Jackson sighed, he know that he broken his promise. That he will stay the night. It is about Mark of course he must to broken his promise.

                “I am sorry, okay? I didn’t mean to break my words. It just, I am worried about Mark” said Jackson. Youngji just rolled her eyes felt annoyed. Her action suddenly made Jackson felt irritated too. He already feel guilty and apologize. What she want him to do? The night is already over and Jackson can’t turn back time too. Why Youngji always feeling angry every time Jackson mention Mark’s name? is she still didn’t know that compare to her, Jackson already know Mark longer. So the priority must be different. Without he realize it, he voice his thought out loud.

                “Are you in love with Mark, Jack?” 

               


End file.
